Today, my mom said I need to change the type of bra I wear because it makes my boobs look too big, and apparently aunties don't like big boobs. TMDL

Today, I realized that instead of getting grounded, I get beat. Instead of getting a talk, i get beat. Instead of getting presents, I get beat. TMDL

Today, I realized that whenever you are trying to watch something on TV, your parents tell you to lower the volume while they are talking so loud themselves that you can't even hear the tv at full volume. TMDL

Today, my family was invited to a dawat. My mom isn't cooking or letting me eat anything for the whole day because there will be food at the dawat. This was at noon. The dinner is at 7pm. We won't get there until 8pm. TMDL

Today, I found out that Shahid Kapoor is my second cousin. I really want to visit India now so I can meet him! TMDL

Today, my uncle saw the toe next to my big toe was smaller than my big toe. He said my future wife would dominate me. TMDL

Today, I went to a wedding which said that dinner would be served at 10.15. We didn't get to eat till 1:00 AM. TMDL

Today, I am at a crazy Punjabi wedding. Looking around, there are literally people being trampled on the dance floor, and the buffet line leads all the way out the door. On further inspection there is a white couple quietly waltzing while the groom is trying to teach the bhangra. TMDL

Today, my mom was complaining about how I don't walk straight enough. Why? Because some aunty complained to her about me! TMDL

Today, I got slapped because I didn't make my bed for the last 2 days. TMDL

Today, I told my mom that Babbu Mann was coming to a city near us. She said that she didn't need to waste money just to hear him sing, when we could hear him on the radio. I told her that the concert was free. She said 'Oh, then we can go see him'. TMDL

Today, I went to the mandir and some auntie called me besharam because I was wearing jeans and a kurti top. TMDL

Today, my mom wanted to return something to Wal-mart that she bought yesterday because it was a waste of money. I don't understand why she buys it then realizes it's too much and return it. This isn't the first time she's has done this. Customer service knows her by name. TMDL

Today, it's my birthday. Instead of celebrating, the family tree is grieving over the fact that it's too late to find a husband now. I'm 24. TMDL

Today, I went to McDonald's with my friends and family. I asked for barbecue sauce, and I got the first one free. I asked for another and the employee said 5 cents. Without hesitation, I declined and walked away. TMDL

Today, I was called a slut for having a white boyfriend by a group of Desi men who were out with their Desi girlfriends. I have never met any of them before and none of them know me. TMDL

Today, I found out my girlfriend is friends with my cousin's best friend. It's now only a matter of time until it gets back to my parents. TMDL

Today, I was in swimming class. I'm the only person who wears a wet suit so my legs won't show. Thanks mom. TMDL

Today, while looking up info on my future college, my mom came in my room and accused me of wasting all my time in front of the computer. I had just trimmed and mowed the lawn, vacuumed the house, and cleaned the bathroom. She took my laptop, then sat down at her desk and browsed YouTube on it. TMDL

Today, while playing Rock Band, I scored a 99% on expert. The first thought that came into my mind was "I could have done better." TMDL

Today, my dad told me why girls get married off quickly. It's because we're a burden. Thanks Dad, I love you too (I'm a 14 year old girl). TMDL

Today, I saw this girl on YouTube who can play the dhol like nobodys business! Just type in punjabiyan di shaan and you will see how good she is! I just wanted to put it on here to show you guys! TMDL

Today, as a joke, my boyfriend asked my mom for permission to kiss me. She said no, not until we are married! Did I mention we have been dating for 3 years and are getting married in a month? TMDL

Today, I went to the airport to receive my cousins coming in from Alberta. I told my little cousin that shes in India and not in Brampton. She believed me as she saw that my whole town is filled with brown culture and people. TMDL

Today, I am determined to get pregnant before my sister in law. TMDL

Today, we ran out of salsa for our Tostito's. My famiy then proceeded to use moti chutney as a substitute. TMDL

Today, I realized that if Amitabh, or Sharukh Khan died, it would be ten times worse than Michael Jackson's death, and I would actually cry. TMDL

Today, I heard a great desi joke on the radio -- "This Indian couple had a baby boy whose blood type was B-. The first thing they did was get him a blood transplant from B- to A+ ." TMDL

Today, my friend and I went to a restaurant. His parents called and asked where he was. In a few minutes his parents walked all the way to the restaurant to see if he was telling the truth. TMDL

Today, my sister's in laws called and said they were coming to London for the day. They said they would arrive at our house at 8am. Not only did they only give us 1 night's notice but they arrived four hours late. TMDL

Today, my little sister was reading something and it was about Justin Bieber. My mom and dad saw. Not only did she get a lecture about looking at boys but so did I for not being a good example and how she probably learnt to be besharam from me. TMDL

Today, it was my birthday party. I got a amethyst jewelry set from a friend. It was the same jewelry set she got for her birthday 2 months prior which I attended and saw when she opened presents. TMDL

Today, I went to go get my learner's permit. When I was finally up in line, the lady asked for my identification like she normally would. She asked for my green card. I was born and raised in the U.S. and therefore have no green card. TMDL

Today, I realized that when we were young instead of going to the pool we went to our front yard and played in the sprinkler. TMDL

Today, my cousins from Bangladesh and I went to the beach. I came out in a bikini to swim. My cousins were checking me out and making passes at me. TMDL

Today, I realised that our tv remote, DVD remote, sound system remote, and even our air conditioner remote which has like 2 buttons on it are all still in their plastic packaging from when we got them 3 years ago. TMDL

Today, my mother came into my room to tell me what a great job I'm doing by sacrificing my social life and many other things to make my family happy. I feel really dirty, considering the fact that I've had a boyfriend for the past two years. TMDL

Today, I realized that even though my father has graduated top of his class from IIT (with a degree in software engineering) and IIM, it is impossible for him to change his Facebook profile picture on his own. TMDL

Today, my dad came home in a really good mood. I asked him why. He said,"We got a McDonald's coupon written in Hindi! And even better than that they're offering a free smoothie!"That made my day. TMDL

Today, I went to the bookstore with my friend. As I was looking through the books, I saw some that looked good. When I looked at the prices, i walked out of the store. TMDL

Today, a desi girl in my summer class was explaining to a black girl how Avatar comes from the Hindi word 'avatar.' She basically took all the credit for the movie. As if desis came up with the idea for the movie! I realized how desis take credit for stuff they didn't do in the first place. TMDL

Today, I realized every time my Mom goes into an Indian shop she DEMANDS a discount. TMDL

Today, after buying a birthday present for my friend I decided to wrap it in my favorite wrapping paper but my mom didn't let me because she didn't want to waste such nice and expensive wrapping paper. We got it for $2.00. TMDL

Today, my parents are making me study for the SAT's the rest of the summer because I got a 2310. They're out of 2400. TMDL

Today, we ran out of yogurt and I asked my mom where to put the container. She told me to throw it away. I was so surprised and proud. TMDL

Today, I went to the store to get a drink. The drink cost $1.29, so I proceeded to give $1.25 and had no more money. I would've paid the four cents. The desi clerk refused to give me the drink until his white worker friend told him to just give it and forget about the 4 cents. TMDL

Today, one of the most stressful events of my life took place. My roommate and I are both Indian & she has a white boyfriend who is staying with us for the summer. Poor boy was told to stay quiet and hide in one of the bedrooms in our apartment while her family came to visit. TMDL

Today, I realized that an Indian girl has the saddest life. She can't leave the house by herself but her brothers can. She's raised by her parents but then has to go live in a strangers house for the rest of her life where she does all the work and still gets treated like shit. TMDL

Today, I realized I've lived my life like a robot, followilng my parents' orders to a T, and they're still not happy with me. In fact, I got yelled at for the tenth time today. TMDL

Today, I realized ever since they've been charging for grocery bags my mom and I always go to self-checkout and steal some bags. TMDL

Today, I was watching an Indian show and the girl gets shot and the cops come and arrest the shooter. Then the entire family surrounds her and watches her die but no one calls the ambulance. Soo realistic. TMDL

Today, my family & I went to a crowded restaurant. The wait was 1.5 hours long. My mum demanded to speak to the manager, who turned out to be desi, and he lowered our wait to 10 minutes. TMDL

Today, my nanimama (grandma) visited me for the second time in my whole 16 years. Why? Because I was adopted and I am gori. She acts like she hates me, but then tells all her friends that her grandaughter is blond, and speaks proper punjabi. TMDL

Today, I found out that they're making an Indian version of Twilight and Imran khan would be playing the role of Robert Pattinson. I'm excited! TMDL

Today, I realized that my summer math class consists of 10 desis in a class of 14 people. None of the desis failed they're all trying to get ahead. TMDL

Today, my mom was complaining about how she has to do all the chores at home. She went to India for one month and came back two days ago. While she was gone I did all the chores and took care of my brother and dad while going to school. Desi moms are so unappreciative. TMDL

Today, I walked into a desi movie store. There were about 10 desi guys there that kept staring at me and smiling. When I left they checked me out. TMDL

Today, we were at my cousins wedding in Texas and they asked for the groom's mother's side of the family to go up for pictures. We went up and there were so many of us we couldn't even fit on the stage. TMDL

Today, I was in the kitchen looking for something to eat and then my sister comes and says that I'm fat. TMDL

Today, I finally came out to my parents that I am a lesbian after hiding it for 8 years. My flight to India leaves in about 7 hours. TMDL

Today, I realized I click on comments on TMDL posts just to see if Priyam commented. Gotta love the mini quarrels. TMDL

Today, I went to one of my American friends parties. While entering through the door, I realize I'm the only one taking my shoes off. TMDL

Today, my family was preparing for Rakhi celebrations. I am the only girl in my family. I overheard my grandma saying "Well at least we can use her for this day otherwise what is she needed for." TMDL

Today, I went to the mall with my mom. I asked her if she intended on buying me clothes today. I spent the next half hour getting lectured on all the clothes I haven't worn since 7th grade. I'm a sophmore. TMDL

Today, I can't even openly cry over my heartbreak because my mom thinks there's no such thing as love before marriage. She thinks it's all a creation of Bollywood. TMDL

Today, I realize that whenever I do something wrong, regardless of what it is, my mom makes a direct comparison with my dad and how I get it from him. Need I mention that I "inherit" all good things from her only? TMDL

Today, my mom was randomly discussing school and that's when i discovered that she still thinks that we students sit in class according to gender. TMDL

Today, my dad gave me the you can choose your guy lecture. Later I was talking to one of my guy friends on msn and then my mom caught me and she told me and I got beat. TMDL

Today, I was told there are two types of girls. Those which are good to party with and those which are good to marry. It's the girl who chooses which she wants to be. TMDL

Today, around 9 pm, all my desi friends on msn changed their online status to "away". Ten minutes later I did the same. It was desi dinner time. TMDL

Today, it's been six months that my in-laws have been living with us. I have been cooking, cleaning, and doing everything that I possibly could and they still are not grateful. TMDL

Today, I figured out my mom never uses the gifts that people give us when they come to our house. I asked her why and she said "so we won't have to buy other people gifts and waste our money when we go to their house, we can just use these." TMDL

Today, I jokingly told my mom that Amitabh Bachan had died. She freaked out then told me not to talk like that about your elders. TMDL

Today, my 12 year old sister registered in both the youth and teen summer reading programs so that she could get twice the free stuff. TMDL

Today, my husband got mad at me over dumb crap and told me he wants nothing to do with me. Thirty minutes later he asked me to make him roti. Desi men at least stand by your words. TMDL

Today, actually for a while, I realized something. When I am in India, people ask me where I am from and I say I am from US. When I am in US, people ask me where I'm from, I say I'm from India. TMDL

Today, my husband and I went out and when we came back my mother-in-law would not talk to me because we didn't take out her four daughters with us. TMDL

Today, my mom planned my future out. TMDL

Today, my little brother read my dad one of these and he gave him a 30 minute lecture on how to be productive with his time and not listen to all this nonsense because it will only corrupt his mind. However, he decided to download this app on his iPhone to keep him entertained at work. TMDL

Today, I was watching the news and my mom heard the words sexual abuse. She then gave me a lecture on how I shouldn't be watching news inappropriate for my age. I'm 16. TMDL

Today, I realized that when I read old books that take place in the 13th century or something like that it reminds me of India, because all the girls do is cook and clean and get married off at a young age. TMDL

Today, I told my mom I was so tired and stressed out due to my responsibilities. She then told me about how she had four kids by my age. I am 20. TMDL

Today, my mom was unloading groceries from the car. She accidentally left a package of chicken out all night, and took it back to Costco the next day claiming it had been spoiled when she bought it. She got a refund. TMDL

Today, my mom told me told clean the house, I asked why since the maid is coming tomorrow, she replied by saying, "The house has to look good for the maid." Oh my gosh mom, the maid is supposed to clean the house! NOT ME! TMDL

Today, when some desi called me stupid i called his mama stupid (as a joke). He then proceeded to tell his mom what I said to him. I got a call from that house. I ended up getting slapped by my parents and having to call that family and apologize. I'll be happy desi when he moves to India later. TMDL

Today, I realized that the most important part of my mom's shopping trips is making me guess how much she paid for something so she can then exclaim the real sale price and prove that she is the number 1 shopper in the world. TMDL

Today, when I asked my parents if I could start shaving, they responded as if it was the most rididculous thing they'd heard. I'm 14 and I'm growing a beard. I hate Indian genes. TMDL

Today, I tripped and scraped my knee. Instead of feeling bad for me, my mom just yelled at me. TMDL

Today, my grandpa was reading his newspaper and was pointing at every word with his middle finger. TMDL

Today, I realized everytime my dad or mom don't get their way with a white person, they always assume the person is racist. TMDL

Today, I asked my parents for a car with a sun roof and they said no. Why? Because it would distract me from driving! TMDL

Today, my punjabi mamoo called me to wish me happy birthday. First thing he said was "ullu ki pathi". That's how they show love. TMDL

Today, while getting things ready for my marriage, I was wondering how 'undesi' my parents are since they're letting me get married to someone I fell in love with. Then I remembered that they've known him since we were eleven, he's handsome, rich, and has a great job. Problem solved. TMDL

Today, while driving home from my aunt's house we had to stop the car in the middle of the road because my mom's dupatta was sticking out the car door. TMDL

Today, I went to the store. At this store when you want a cart you pay 0.25$, and you get your quarter back when you return the cart. I was complaining about my allowance. My mom told me to get the 0.25$ and put away the other carts to make an extra dollar, really mom? TDML

Today, I went to a McDonalds and there was a desi guy at the counter. When I asked for a few napkins he looked at my seated family, counted and gave me exactly 6 napkins. TMDL

Today, I remembered how I found TMDL. I looked up "desi" on search in the app store, and this was the first free app. TMDL

Today, while watching semi-old Hindi films, I noticed that whenever the couple dance in a public place in a foreign country, there's always goras in the back just standing watching. I pay more attention to their reactions in the back than I do of the couple dancing. TMDL

Today, I found out that the easiest way to make a desi feel happy is call them "white-skinned" and the most hurtful comment is "kala". TMDL

Today, once again I decided to creep my desi friends on facebook and ended up saying "how do they know each other" multiple times. TMDL

Today, my parents and I went to watch Toy Story 3. Before the movie, there was a short about how piracy is destroying the film industry. My mum, only half listening, whispers "I haven't watched Toy Story 1 and 2. Do you think you can download it for me?" TMDL

Today, my cousin took me to the movies. He didn't have money so I lent him a movie pass. When we were riding home I told him he had to pay me back. He glared at me. TDML

Today, I got a free Seventeen magazine in the mail. My mom flipped through every page and gave me a long lecture and slapped me when she saw the section that had to do with relationships. In the end, I didn't get to read the magazine. TMDL

Today, I asked my parents for a bike and they said we can get one from a garage sale for $10. TMDL

Today, I realized that I have grown up thinking Hajmola was candy. They are digestive tablets. TMDL

Today, we were in the car and I was listening to English songs. My dad said ''band kar yai bakwaas ganaa!'' (stop these stupid songs!) Then he proceeded to put on his 1960's Hindi songs, and told me that if I want to listen to my songs, i have to bring my iPod. Dad, i don't even have one! TMDL

Today, I was talking to my white friend and she was bragging about her boyfriend. In return, I started bragging about how many rishtas I have. TMDL